/nate/ - Coal - archived.st

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:19:15 No.22103 View View Original Report

Mr Florist, take my order now

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:18:33 No.22102 View View Original Report

>today we are celebrating the victory against dr zogboss and the epic battle on the roof or so i've been planted

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:18:17 No.22101 View View Original Report

>This refers to what he lost during his adventures through the entire PVZ timeline. He slowly lost all connection to what made him human. Now, this brings up a very important question; is Crazy Dave really who he says he is? My theory is that Crazy Dave was a CIA experiment to see who could defeat the zombies. Prior to the events of all PVZ games, Crazy Dave was merely a homeless crack addict who lived outside of an abandoned 7/11, he was found by the CIA, and experimented on. After the experimentations by the CIA (which consisted of mostly cock and ball torture), he was sent out as an EVA unit to fight off Angels that started to invade earth. He was a powerful weapon, and was able to completely destroy the Angel’s AT fields. While he was successful, one day, a whiny bitch named Shinji or some shit caused the entire world to turn into Fanta and everyone died. After this event (name Human Instrumentality), the timeline reset, but Crazy Dave remained the same. During the newly created timeline, zombies had appeared in place of Angels. This lead to the events of Plants Vs. Zombies, where Crazy Dave was a prominent figurehead and savior of the world. One fun fact about Crazy Dave, he met with many prominent socialist dictators, such as Mao Zedong, Josip Broz Tito, Joseph Stalin, and Enver Hoxha. He was taught his fighting tactics by Tito, and followed Titoism thoroughly.

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:18:12 No.22100 View View Original Report

Mr Florist, I want some sunflowers for my pink princess

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:17:32 No.22099 View View Original Report

>inb4 'Then we'll attack on your roof, during a foggy nighttime!'
Hmmm, that sounds scary if I do say so myself - Not! Roof cleaners will clean you up.

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:16:23 No.22098 View View Original Report

>200 million threepeaters are loaded
>Dave cries "take aim!"

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:16:04 No.22097 View View Original Report

>inb4 'We'll attack on your le roof and enter your chimney!'
Pots. We have clay pots, and they're alive.

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:14:57 No.22096 View View Original Report

>take the hypno-shroom pill

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:14:49 No.22095 View View Original Report

>inb4 'WE ARE GONNA ATTACK WHEN THERES A FOG GOING!!'
Haha! Wow! You haven't realized it yet didn't you? There's lantern plants.

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Chud Tue 02 May 2023 10:13:44 No.22094 View View Original Report

>inb4 'THEN WE'LL ATTACK AT NIGHT!!'
Knee slapper. With this amount of sunflowers we will win regardless.

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