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Chud No.22101 View View Original Report
>This refers to what he lost during his adventures through the entire PVZ timeline. He slowly lost all connection to what made him human. Now, this brings up a very important question; is Crazy Dave really who he says he is? My theory is that Crazy Dave was a CIA experiment to see who could defeat the zombies. Prior to the events of all PVZ games, Crazy Dave was merely a homeless crack addict who lived outside of an abandoned 7/11, he was found by the CIA, and experimented on. After the experimentations by the CIA (which consisted of mostly cock and ball torture), he was sent out as an EVA unit to fight off Angels that started to invade earth. He was a powerful weapon, and was able to completely destroy the Angel’s AT fields. While he was successful, one day, a whiny bitch named Shinji or some shit caused the entire world to turn into Fanta and everyone died. After this event (name Human Instrumentality), the timeline reset, but Crazy Dave remained the same. During the newly created timeline, zombies had appeared in place of Angels. This lead to the events of Plants Vs. Zombies, where Crazy Dave was a prominent figurehead and savior of the world. One fun fact about Crazy Dave, he met with many prominent socialist dictators, such as Mao Zedong, Josip Broz Tito, Joseph Stalin, and Enver Hoxha. He was taught his fighting tactics by Tito, and followed Titoism thoroughly.
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