Maybe im autistic where I constantly think and reflect on every minute detail. But I can't help notice everyone having their conversations and following complete distractions. I was at the airport and I was just looking at everyone, and everyone just seemed like an atheist. I was just standing there watching people hugging, people arguing over parking, and It hit me (like everyday) that I'm no one special and I'm also going to die. I put my faith in Jesus Christ but it's so hard when you're surrounded by people constantly driven by ego and atheists. Plus I depend on my parents (people who I love but I don't like) I have 3 friends, 1 high achiever addicted to drugs, 1 good stable depressed guy but again egoist despite acting the opposite. I feel trapped. I'm not where I want to be in life, I expected to have a wife by now, to move out. Because I've been very quiet my entire life, people analyze every detail I do. I used to think my parents weren't strict but they are, I was just too quiet and too much of a good kid. But as I'm an adult and I'm becoming more social and doing more stuff, they're becoming stricter and stricter (annoying)