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>be christian, very religious
>have the urge to be abusive and rape men (including watching them and stalking them)
>had a man who wasnt a virgin and felt primal rage to the fact that I started beating my stuffed animals (when we were long distance and he told me), when we met IRL I choked him and told him Id kill him for going to some fucking slut before me. I am waiting until marriage so I couldnt do much.
Why must god do this to me. I hate having impure thoughts and I hate myself for looking at this thread. Someone told me about soyjak and I regret it. I make more money than him, I have offered him multiple times to be my boywife, etc.. I hate the idea of him going to anyone else and threatened to do PiV (he knows how important my celibacy is to me so whenever I tried to rape him he always reminds me). He is a bit scared of impregnating me, however I just want him to be my house husband and breeding stock. I think I will just be celibate until 25 if this is the case, until I find my boywife to abuse and threaten. I never want to hurt those I like, but I just want them to give themselves to me 100%.
