I shall tell you how you actually can as a fat lazy fuck. You can't just eat less because you are retarded and weak willed.
<First count what you diet looks like for a weak and get a rough calorie count.
<If its above 3000 calories, bring it down to at least 3000 calories
<Replace carbs with protein as much as possible
<Start going to the gym and build muscle through lifts. Push/Pull split is fine.
<Don't bulk but don't cut for a year.
<when you finally have muscle mass, then start your cut. just try to hit 200 calories a day. It will be much easier with more high metabolism mass as muscle vs low metabolism mass like fat.
And thats how you do it.